NEVER KNOWING ABOUT TOMORROW

CONTENT: THIS IS A VERY PERSONAL STORY ABOUT MY LIFE; LIVING WITH A BRAIN DISORDER (MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS), HOW IT CHANGES DAILY, HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT AND UPDATES. PLEASE READ FOR; KNOWLEDGE AND GOOD INTENTION! THANKS FOR READING, I HOPE THIS WILL REACH SOMEONE TO KNOW THEY’RE NOT ALONE AND WE ARE WARRIORS! 

   BELOW IS WHAT MS LOOKS LIKE IN THIS SPECIFIC PERSON’S PICTURE

A picture of what lesions look like is Multiple Sclerosis. Their different in everyone but, this is the basics of it.

 Hey everyone I hope you’re well and happy. I’m feeling very emotional today because, I’m now realizing that I am actually living with an incurable brain disease which, is completely unpredictable, and Doctor’s and Researcher’s don’t know much about MS either.  I guess I’m having a reality check. I got the disc from my MRI like I always do and enclosed with it were two documents. The MRI was done with and with-out contrast in my cervical spine and head. I believe the report for my cervical spine was final because it was signed by a radiologist, and the other was only signed by the technologist. So it’s not finalized and I haven’t heard anything yet. I know it takes maybe up to a week because of the holiday.

    My cervical spine has multiple bulging discs, and multiple cysts, I knew this already but, the swelling and size difference between the left and right side of my neck is ridiculous! I wonder what my Neurologist will say about this. Looking at the disc of my head scared the crap out of me! I have to be honest it’s scary and I study these because I have experience in the Medical field and I research everything that’s just me. Would you want to learn about a brain disease that your going to have to live with for the rest of your life? Personally, I do! I’m clearly not a Radiologist or a Neurologist but, I’ve been doing this for four years and I was also taught. This is what I saw: new larger lesions which, I can’t tell if they’re still there or if they grew, old lesions, a very large white spot in the back left side of my brain. There were also multiple lesions which,were similar to my MRI November, 2014. My last MRI said I have, “more than 10 new lesions”, from one Neuro. and the other said, ” at least 10 new active lesions”. Does that mean to many to count, as in progressive MS?

                                                                                                                  THIS IS A PICTURE SHOWING “OPTIC NEURITIS,” AND THE DIFFERNCE BETWEEN A NORMAL EYE,

optic n 2

The thing that scares me the most is the very large white spot in the left posterior occipital area or brainstem. There’s also many small white dots all along the outside of my brain and, yes it’s  inside of my head in the very top of my brain. Would you be at least a little nervous? I am! It’s horrible to think that I have a brain disease that was incurable until a recently discovered possible cure. I’ve heard of many people paying millions of dollars to across seas to have this done and it does work. The moral of the story is the cure is stem cells. The only cure for a brain disease that affects people in such a miserable, indescribable way that would haunt you in your dreams but, invisible to the naked eye,  and everyone who has it is different. There’s no way to predict when you may be blind, because I personally have had optic neuritis two times already never knowing if this is the time I go blind, if my vision will be restored or ever back to the way it was. Knowing you don’t know if tomorrow you’ll be in a wheel-chair, maybe having to use a cane to walk, or not walking at all.

  WE WARRIOR”S with MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS struggle every day of our lives with never knowing what’s coming next. Still, we have an amazing support for each other like I’ve never seen in my life. We are all different but, only we, know how we feel.  I say MS has made me a better person and it has. I usually have a smile on my face, am willing to help anyone who gives me the chance too, do everything I can to “help thy neighbor”, and I would go out of my way anytime to be a helping hand. Everyone I have met with this disease is so positive, caring for others, just such amazing, and inspiring people. After everything we’ve been through and will continue to forever we’re thankful to be here. So the only cure found ever has been stem cell transplant. What the f*** sorry but, in reality these people (including myself), are such good people with good morals, and nicer than most people I know, just makes me question everything! What would you do?

11136618_1027140370647770_3919117013558368025_n

 ⇒ IF YOU WOUL PLEASE SHARE WHAT YOU WOULD HONESTLY DO. I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW AND POSSIBLY HAVE A NICE DISCUSSION GOING! I LOVE HEARING FROM ALL OF YOU! ⇐

  Instead of contemplating and crying in wonder of what that very large white spot in my brain may be I’m going to go do my home-work now and move on with my life because, I change the inevitable.

   If anyone takes anything from this blog, I wish it to be similar to or this following statement; if you know anyone with this or any disease support them, love them, and most of all show them! If it can’t be seen to the naked eye that means we who have it can’t see it either! Love everyone for we are only here together for a short time so don’t waste it with hate.

    ♥ONE LOVE♥

                       JENNY  

    A.K.A.     MS book quote

 “A WARRIOR OF TIME”

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3 thoughts on “NEVER KNOWING ABOUT TOMORROW

  1. You are awesome. Sure, most people like to know what tomorrow will bring, but nobody lives in tomorrow… they live in today. Keep living for today, and take things as they come, and you will kick ass for as long as you keep deciding to do so. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. HEY PHIL:
      THANKS FOR THE NICE COMMENTS 🙂 I LOVE YOUR ATTITUDE AND OUT-LOOK ON LIFE IT’S BEAUTIFUL!!! SOMETIMES, YOU JUST HAVE TO KEEP ON, KEEPING ON! ONE LOVE,
      JENNY

      Like

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